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How a twist on service helped turn my grumpiness into gratitude
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Chocolate, herbal tea, a face mask, a good book and a bath bomb? How could I not be in a good mood! Gifts from my husband that sparked gratitude after a grumpy day. - photo by Carmen Rasmusen Herbert
As I write this column, I am sitting in a fluffy bed eating Godiva chocolate waiting for my rose-scented bath to be drawn. A little cup of herbal tea is sitting on my nightstand, along with a new book. A pair of soft pajamas is laid out on the bed with the words Good Mood printed across the front. My boys are all downstairs playing with my husband, who just finished making and cleaning up dinner.

Sound like a dream? It is. And its actually happening!

No, this is not a nightly occurrence at our house. I dont even deserve it, to tell you the truth. The last few weeks have been very difficult for me (how many times have I written that?) and tonight was the result of me emotionally losing it on the phone with my husband.

I just dont feel like me, I told him. Instead of bucking up and getting out and looking beyond myself, all I felt like doing was laying in bed. I was tired. So very, very tired of dealing with my boys whom I have felt constantly at battle with and have officially dubbed the Most Rowdy and Rambunctious, especially my youngest who has reached a new level of naughty.

Yesterday, he threw a toy phone at another little boy during our mommy workout class, resulting in a serious cut and bad bruise. Today he attacked (as quoted by one of the teachers at gymnastics) two other little kids in the foam pit trying to claim his dominance over the play area. How do you discipline a 2-year-old? Besides taking him out of the situation, putting him in time out, giving him a spanking, making him apologize or taking away privileges? So far none of those have worked.

After tearfully asking what else I can do and explaining how I just feel like Im in a funk, my husband responded with, The best way to get out of that funk is to do something for someone else. I always feel better when I serve someone. I knew he was right. But the stubborn part of me thought, For crying out loud, what does he think I do all day? My whole life is service with a capital S, and that goes for every other mother on the planet!

I sort of said as much, and then he said, Then let me serve you.

Service and gratitude go hand in hand, I think. When we focus on being thankful for the blessings we have, it makes us want to turn around and bless the lives of others. Thats why my husband is always happy. He doesnt need a shirt to tell him to cheer up, or chocolate, or a warm bath, or a night off from dishes and bedtime duty, although all those things are glorious and wonderful.

No matter how loud it gets, my husband joked before he shut the door, you stay up here with the door locked. Ill take care of everything."

He knows service is the way to truly be happy. Its funny, as much as I appreciate being served and I do I actually really do feel just as good serving others. Even when those others are my not-so-grateful kids.

My November challenge to myself (and I would love to have you join me) is to not only recognize my blessings and voice that gratitude and thankfulness, but to try to follow the example of my husband and do something for someone else that makes them feel that way, too. I love this time of year when we look for the good in our lives and turn to God in gratitude.

Tonight, Im grateful for my saint of a spouse as well as warm baths, good books and locked doors.
Its toxic: New study says blue light from tech devices can speed up blindness
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A new study from the University of Toledo found that blue light from digital devices can transform molecules in your eyes retina into cell killers. - photo by Herb Scribner
It turns out checking Twitter or Facebook before bed is bad for your health.

A new study from the University of Toledo found that blue light from digital devices can transform molecules in your eyes retina into cell killers.

That process can lead to age-related macular degeneration, which is a leading cause of blindness in the United States, according to the researchs extract.

Blue light is a common issue for many modern Americans. Blue light is emitted from screens, most notably at night, causing sleep loss, eye strain and a number of other issues.

Dr. Ajith Karunarathne, assistant professor in the UT Department of Chemistry and Biochemistry, said our constant exposure to blue light cant be blocked by the lens or cornea.

"It's no secret that blue light harms our vision by damaging the eye's retina. Our experiments explain how this happens, and we hope this leads to therapies that slow macular degeneration, such as a new kind of eye drop, he said.

Macular degeneration is an incurable eye disease that often affects those in their 50s or 60s. It occurs after the death of photoreceptor cells in the retina. Those cells need retinal to sense light and help signal the brain.

The research team found blue light exposure created poisonous chemical molecules that killed photoreceptor cells

"It's toxic. If you shine blue light on retinal, the retinal kills photoreceptor cells as the signaling molecule on the membrane dissolves," said Kasun Ratnayake, a Ph.D. student researcher working in Karunarathne's cellular photo chemistry group. "Photoreceptor cells do not regenerate in the eye. When they're dead, they're dead for good."

However, the researchers found a molecule called alpha-tocopherol, which comes from Vitamin E, can help prevent cell death, according to Futurism.

The researchers plan to review how light from TVs, cellphones and tablet screens affect the eyes as well.

"If you look at the amount of light coming out of your cellphone, it's not great but it seems tolerable," said Dr. John Payton, visiting assistant professor in the UT Department of Chemistry and Biochemistry. "Some cellphone companies are adding blue-light filters to the screens, and I think that is a good idea."

Indeed, Apple released a Night Shift mode two years ago to help quell blue lights strain on the eyes, according to The Verge. The screen will dim into a warmer, orange light that will cause less stress on the eyes.