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How do I keep my son from hanging out with the wrong crowd?
How do I keep my son from hanging out with the wrong crowd.KS
We can have no better clue to a man's character than the company he keeps. - photo by Shutterstock.com

Q: I’m worried about my 14-year-old son. He has never really had very close friends, but this year he started hanging out with a crowd that isn’t the best influence on him. Ever since he started hanging out with them he has begun coming home late, argues with me about doing his chores (sometimes he just won’t do them), and his grades are starting to slip. I’m especially worried because school will soon be in summer break and I’d like him to find new friends before then but I don’t know how. How can I help him get back on the right track before summer comes?
Sincerely,
Worried Parent
A: Sorry to hear about your son. It's very common for children about that age to begin challenging the rules (and challenge their parents) more and "experiment" with new friends. Sometimes this is just a phase, and sometimes it lasts longer. As a parent, there are things you can do to help make sure it is just a phase and that it doesn't last too long.
The first thing to do is to be understanding. In early adolescence, children's brains begin to develop and they begin questioning things that they always took for granted. They also become more autonomous. As their bodies are more fully developed, they realize they can do a lot of things on their own and they begin to test limits (and their parents) as to what they can and can't do. This is a good thing. If they don't learn autonomy, as well as learn their own limitations, then they'll have difficulties knowing how to make important decisions and even have difficult launching from home.
Second, question your rules you have for them. A lot of times parents keep the same rules for their 14 year old that they've had since they were ten. When this happens, teens feel frustrated and begin to act out. In this case, the parents need to get rid of old rules then identify age appropriate rules and implement them.
After you've exercised understanding and identified rules that they can do without, the next things to do is to create appropriate consequences for breaking the new rules and the ones that are left. Think of consequences as being like Goldilocks. They can't be too hot or too cold. They have to be just right in order to be effective.
For example, a lot of parents will immediately take away a teen's cell phone at the slightest infraction of the rules because they know that's the most important thing to their teen. This is overly harsh and your teen knows it. She is going to complain that it's unfair, like she always does anyway, except this time she'll be right. And instead of her learning a lesson she'll just learn to resent you for being unfair. Deep down, a child knows when you're really being unfair and when he's just saying that because he's upset.
Let him choose his friends
When it comes to his friends, it's important to let him choose his own friends. This aids his development by helping him learn how to navigate social situations which will be critically important as he grows older. However, you can set guidelines/rules to make sure that he stays safe and doesn't get into too much trouble regardless of who he's with.
For example, giving him a curfew and making sure you know the names of the parents of the house where they're going to be, as well as their phone number, helps you to be in the know and helps to operate within healthy guidelines by making sure he has friends who have good relationships with their parents. You can set other rules like he has to text back within 15 minutes of when you text him so you can stay in good contact with him.
These guidelines will help him make his own choices but also give him healthy parameters of how to make choices that are healthy. In the end, he may still hang out with the kids that you don't like much. But at least by implementing appropriate rules and boundaries you can rest assure that he'll be safe and he's making good decisions regardless of who he's hanging out with. Then you won't have to worry about him having to find friends, either. Here are some more tips on teaching children to have good friends.  Aaron Anderson is a therapist and owner of The Marriage and Family Clinic in Denver. He also writes and speaks about relationships. Checkout his blog RelationshipRx.net for expert information on improving your relationship without the psychobabble.

Its toxic: New study says blue light from tech devices can speed up blindness
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A new study from the University of Toledo found that blue light from digital devices can transform molecules in your eyes retina into cell killers. - photo by Herb Scribner
It turns out checking Twitter or Facebook before bed is bad for your health.

A new study from the University of Toledo found that blue light from digital devices can transform molecules in your eyes retina into cell killers.

That process can lead to age-related macular degeneration, which is a leading cause of blindness in the United States, according to the researchs extract.

Blue light is a common issue for many modern Americans. Blue light is emitted from screens, most notably at night, causing sleep loss, eye strain and a number of other issues.

Dr. Ajith Karunarathne, assistant professor in the UT Department of Chemistry and Biochemistry, said our constant exposure to blue light cant be blocked by the lens or cornea.

"It's no secret that blue light harms our vision by damaging the eye's retina. Our experiments explain how this happens, and we hope this leads to therapies that slow macular degeneration, such as a new kind of eye drop, he said.

Macular degeneration is an incurable eye disease that often affects those in their 50s or 60s. It occurs after the death of photoreceptor cells in the retina. Those cells need retinal to sense light and help signal the brain.

The research team found blue light exposure created poisonous chemical molecules that killed photoreceptor cells

"It's toxic. If you shine blue light on retinal, the retinal kills photoreceptor cells as the signaling molecule on the membrane dissolves," said Kasun Ratnayake, a Ph.D. student researcher working in Karunarathne's cellular photo chemistry group. "Photoreceptor cells do not regenerate in the eye. When they're dead, they're dead for good."

However, the researchers found a molecule called alpha-tocopherol, which comes from Vitamin E, can help prevent cell death, according to Futurism.

The researchers plan to review how light from TVs, cellphones and tablet screens affect the eyes as well.

"If you look at the amount of light coming out of your cellphone, it's not great but it seems tolerable," said Dr. John Payton, visiting assistant professor in the UT Department of Chemistry and Biochemistry. "Some cellphone companies are adding blue-light filters to the screens, and I think that is a good idea."

Indeed, Apple released a Night Shift mode two years ago to help quell blue lights strain on the eyes, according to The Verge. The screen will dim into a warmer, orange light that will cause less stress on the eyes.