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Moms should be quick to be kind instead of quick to judge
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A recent scary moment made me realize how much I need an extra measure of kindness from other moms. - photo by Erin Stewart
I am convinced there is no place on earth that can raise your blood pressure faster than the pick-up/drop-off line at school.

Other drivers cut you off for seemingly no reason. Parents stop to chat through car windows, totally ignoring the long line of cars behind them. Normally sane mothers and fathers who youve met and actually liked before turn into some sort of imbeciles who dont know how to drive, signal or obey basic traffic or civilization rules.

So, clearly, I get my share of road rage when Im dropping off my kids from school. But recently, I had an experience that made me see this brief but infuriating moment of my day differently.

It started with me waking up, feeling sort of funny. That feeling increased as I corralled the kids into the car, and as we started driving, my heart went berserk. Im no stranger to heart flips and skips since having serious heart problems after pregnancy, but this was different there was no regular beat at all. Dizzy and terrified, I somehow drove to school, knowing my principal husband would be out welcoming kids to school and could take me to the ER.

When I pulled into the drop-off line, I was relieved to see a good friend, and I stopped to ask her to pull over ahead so she could watch my son while I went to the hospital. And when I stopped for all of three seconds the person behind me laid on her horn.

I get it. Ive been there. Why was I stopping in the middle of the drive-through lane like a self-important idiot? Get out of the way, lady!

But heres the thing: The woman behind me had no idea what I was dealing with in that moment. She had no idea that I was scared or that my kids were crying. And all I needed was three seconds.

Of course, she couldnt have known, but thats kind of the point. That moment made me realize how often I do the exact same thing: I judge another mother based on three seconds, having no idea what is going on in their lives.

We all do it.

We judge that mom who is on her cellphone at the park while her kid bugs all the other moms to push him on the swing. We roll our eyes at the woman who is chronically late. We get annoyed when the person in front of us at the grocery checkout line takes forever because every single item has a coupon.

But what if that mom at the park came to the park because shes at the end of her rope with her childs behavioral issues and just needs a minute alone, spaced out on her phone while he plays? Or maybe the lady who is always late is trying to work from home while rising her kids because her husband got laid off. And, most likely, the woman with the coupons is mortified that everyone has to watch her nickel and dime her grocery list to death.

When that lady honked at me in line, I was in the wrong. I was holding up the line. I was doing what I get annoyed at other moms for doing every day. And Im sure if she had known what I was dealing with, she would have never honked. She surely would have tried to help me.

But we dont know. And since we cant know, we must be generous with our kindness.

Just like in the book (and now movie) Wonder, we must be kinder than necessary. That doesnt just apply for children dealing with playground bullies.

We as women and mothers needs to be kinder than necessary, too. We need to go above and beyond and not be stingy with our compassion. Rather than being quick to judge or honk or blame, I can give other mothers what I needed that day, and what we all need sometimes an extra allowance of grace and love.
Its toxic: New study says blue light from tech devices can speed up blindness
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A new study from the University of Toledo found that blue light from digital devices can transform molecules in your eyes retina into cell killers. - photo by Herb Scribner
It turns out checking Twitter or Facebook before bed is bad for your health.

A new study from the University of Toledo found that blue light from digital devices can transform molecules in your eyes retina into cell killers.

That process can lead to age-related macular degeneration, which is a leading cause of blindness in the United States, according to the researchs extract.

Blue light is a common issue for many modern Americans. Blue light is emitted from screens, most notably at night, causing sleep loss, eye strain and a number of other issues.

Dr. Ajith Karunarathne, assistant professor in the UT Department of Chemistry and Biochemistry, said our constant exposure to blue light cant be blocked by the lens or cornea.

"It's no secret that blue light harms our vision by damaging the eye's retina. Our experiments explain how this happens, and we hope this leads to therapies that slow macular degeneration, such as a new kind of eye drop, he said.

Macular degeneration is an incurable eye disease that often affects those in their 50s or 60s. It occurs after the death of photoreceptor cells in the retina. Those cells need retinal to sense light and help signal the brain.

The research team found blue light exposure created poisonous chemical molecules that killed photoreceptor cells

"It's toxic. If you shine blue light on retinal, the retinal kills photoreceptor cells as the signaling molecule on the membrane dissolves," said Kasun Ratnayake, a Ph.D. student researcher working in Karunarathne's cellular photo chemistry group. "Photoreceptor cells do not regenerate in the eye. When they're dead, they're dead for good."

However, the researchers found a molecule called alpha-tocopherol, which comes from Vitamin E, can help prevent cell death, according to Futurism.

The researchers plan to review how light from TVs, cellphones and tablet screens affect the eyes as well.

"If you look at the amount of light coming out of your cellphone, it's not great but it seems tolerable," said Dr. John Payton, visiting assistant professor in the UT Department of Chemistry and Biochemistry. "Some cellphone companies are adding blue-light filters to the screens, and I think that is a good idea."

Indeed, Apple released a Night Shift mode two years ago to help quell blue lights strain on the eyes, according to The Verge. The screen will dim into a warmer, orange light that will cause less stress on the eyes.