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A mad Big Bird and talking frogs
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RING! RING!


“Hello, this is Teya Ryan, president of Georgia Public Broadcasting. I am calling to ask you to consider a donation to GPB. If you donate $250, we will send you a talking frog.”


KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!


“Please excuse me a moment. Yes, Wanda? What is it?”


“Ms. Ryan, sorry to bother you but there is someone at the door dressed like Big Bird and he — or it — insists on seeing you right now.”


“Sir, pardon the interruption. One of our valued associates, former State Sen. Majority Leader Chip Rogers, is in my office and I am sure you understand … Hello? Hello? Can you believe that? The guy just hung up on me! I never got a chance to tell him about the talking frog. OK, Chip. What’s the matter now?”


“Teya, I am trying to be a team player here, but why must I continue to wear this doggone Big Bird outfit? I am an executive producer-community jobs program. I’m still not sure what that means but I don’t think it means letting kids crawl all over me and leave sticky lollipops in my feathers. Just look at these feathers.”


“Chip, we’ve had this conversation before. And please get your feathers out of my face. We agreed to disguise you as Big Bird until we can find something substantive for you to do. Our donors are pretty upset with us right now and we’ve got a bunch of talking frogs to get rid of."


“Teya, would you quit worrying about whiny donors? I am not costing them a dime. My $150,000-a-year salary, if I may remind you, is being funded totally by the taxpayers of Georgia. It’s not like they can’t afford it. After all, the Legislature has cut public education funding by a billion dollars.“


“Please don’t remind me of that.”


“I am paid way more than the governor. I’ll bet Nathan Deal doesn’t have to walk around all day dressed as Big Bird.”


“Look, do you think I enjoy the controversy your appointment has caused? When I took this job, I thought it would mean free tickets to a Smokey Robinson concert and guest appearances on ‘Antiques Roadshow.’ Instead, I spend all my waking hours dealing with a bunch of angry donors, a wiseacre columnist who loves to jerk your chain and a warehouse full of talking frogs. Can you believe I left CNN for this?”


“C’mon, Teya. I am as frustrated as you are. I was once a power in this state. I was somebody. Senate majority leader. A cable television sports handicapper who predicted the outcome of football games. Surely, you remember ‘Will the Winner,’ aka the ‘Atlanta Assassin’? I was good, Teya. Real good.”


“Chip, I’m sorry. I really am.”


“And remember the motel that Tom Graves and I owned in Calhoun? It tanked because we let a bank loan us more money than we could repay. Doesn’t everybody? The default on the loan caused the bank to collapse and got us a lot of bad publicity. Despite that, Tom Graves gets elected to Congress where he talks about fiscal responsibility like he has a clue. Me? I’m sitting here dressed as Big Bird with lollipops in my feathers. Sometimes, I could just cry.”


“Chip, I wish we could continue this conversation but those talking frogs are beginning to smell.”


“People haven’t heard the last of Chip Rogers. No sirree. As my hero Spiro Amburn pointed out, the world is full of ‘pusillanimous pussyfooters’, ‘nattering nabobs of negativism’ and ‘hopeless, hysterical hypochondriacs of history’ and I won’t let them get me down.”


“I think you mean Spiro Agnew, who was Nixon’s vice president. Spiro Amburn is House Speaker David Ralston’s chief of staff. I don’t think Mr. Amburn says weird stuff like that.”


“Really? I could have sworn it was Spiro Amburn. I guess I’ve been out of office longer than I thought.”


“Chip, this has been a meaningful dialogue. Why don’t you go back to your office and see if you can come up with an idea you think will justify your bloated salary. In the meantime, please stop by Wanda’s desk and pick up some talking frogs and send them to that wiseacre columnist with my compliments. Maybe they can talk him into writing about something other than this mess.”


“Gee. Thanks, boss. You’re the best. I knew you could help. Can I give you a lollipop?”


You can reach Dick Yarbrough at yarb2400@bellsouth.net or P.O. Box 725373, Atlanta, GA 31139.

In Effingham County, Progress Starts With a Plan
Guest Editorial by Susan Kraut, President/CEO of Effingham County Chamber of Commerce
Susan Kraut column
A sold-out crowd of more than 150 business and community leaders gathered at Effingham’s New Ebenezer Retreat Center Sept. 24 for the Chamber of Commerce’s annual State of the County Luncheon, hearing updates on economic growth, education, and infrastructure across Effingham County. (Submitted photo)

At last Wednesday’s sold-out State of the County luncheon, more than 150 business and community leaders heard a message that resonated throughout the program: We have a plan, and we’re sticking to it.

Effingham County City Manager Tim Callanan opened his remarks with that thought. It was simple, but powerful. In an era when news feeds churn with controversy and change, it served as a reminder that behind the scenes, steady planning is happening – and those plans are beginning to bear fruit.

Businesses and residents often express frustration about roads, zoning, parks, schools or economic development, feeling that growth is outpacing action. The truth, as Callanan underscored, is that many of those actions are already underway, rooted in master plans that cover everything from transportation and stormwater to parks, communications and public safety.

The challenge is that plans only matter if people know they exist. Too often, businesses and citizens forget these plans are in place, don’t know where to find them or don’t realize how to weigh in at the right moments. When that happens, the community loses the chance to shape its own future and to express the value of those plans – why they matter and why they’re worth supporting.

Planning delivers progress

Last week’s luncheon highlighted how “plans” translate into progress. Mayor Kevin Exley shared Rincon’s ranking as one of Georgia’s safest cities and the city’s launch of the Citizen Central app – a small but meaningful step toward accessible local government. Springfield’s new city manager, Lauren Eargle, outlined a capital improvement plan that includes sidewalks, drainage and playgrounds, along with the less glamorous but vital work of a $35 million wastewater plant upgrade. Guyton’s city manager, Bill Lindsey, discussed contracting with planning consultants, winning grants for sidewalks, and reinvesting in Bazemore Park and downtown revitalization. These aren’t random acts; they’re evidence of intentional planning.

The school district provided another example when Superintendent Yancy Ford noted that Effingham now serves nearly 14,500 students speaking 33 languages. That diversity is an asset – but it also requires careful, proactive investment to maintain the high standards families expect. His most powerful point concerned ESPLOST, the 1-cent Education Special Purpose Local Option Sales Tax. Thanks to community support over the years, ESPLOST has built classrooms, purchased buses, enhanced safety measures, provided Chromebooks to all students, added security cameras and access-control systems, created inclusive playgrounds and athletic facilities open to the community, supported hands-on learning spaces like Honey Ridge, and established the College & Career Academy – a facility credited by Ford as helping lift the district’s graduation rate above 90% and expanding career pathways for a rapidly diversifying student body. And it has done so without incurring long-term debt.

Why ESPLOST matters

Among these examples of planning, none is clearer than ESPLOST — a long-term, voter-approved blueprint for funding education, renewed every five years to stay ahead of growth. The November ballot will again include the ESPLOST renewal, giving voters the opportunity to continue this proven approach to funding school facilities, technology, safety, transportation, inclusive playgrounds and community-accessible athletic fields. Renewing ESPLOST does not create a new tax; it simply extends the existing 1-cent sales tax, allowing residents, visitors and businesses to contribute to improvements that benefit every student. Without it, many of the projects parents and community members count on – such as new buses, safer schools, modern classrooms, career pathways and accessible playgrounds – would stall or require long-term debt.

Renewing ESPLOST is about more than bricks and mortar. It is not a reactionary measure but part of an intentional, ongoing plan to manage growth and maintain education – reinforcing the theme that plans become progress. As the district’s population becomes increasingly diverse and enrollment continues to rise, sustained ESPLOST funding is crucial to scaling programs, expanding facilities and maintaining the high graduation rates and opportunities that families expect. It is about protecting Effingham County’s tradition of educational excellence, maintaining property values and ensuring the workforce being prepared in our schools is ready to meet the needs of local employers. It is an investment in students, families and the future of our communities.

A call to the community

Effingham County is growing. Growth brings challenges, but it also brings opportunities. As the luncheon demonstrated, leaders at every level are working to guide that growth thoughtfully. The next step belongs to business owners, parents and neighbors – to lean in, stay informed and participate.

When hearing about a master plan, a referendum or a public meeting, don’t assume it is someone else’s job. Look up the plan, attend the forum, ask questions and cast a vote. That is how plans become progress – and how a yes vote on ESPLOST reaffirms and continues the community’s long-term plan for educational excellence, reinvesting in Effingham County’s future.