Sarah Palin for President in 2012?

Groan.

Come on, people.

As much as she seems ready to tackle the problems our country is facing, she still needs a few more years of government boxing matches to get her bumps and bruises in.

I mean, she did come on like a storm two years ago, but there is something lackluster about her.

I ain’t hatin’, I’m just sayin’.

She’s what you might call “a Gump.”  You know, little lines out of Forrest Gump apply to her in some ways.

“Stupid is as stupid does.” Watch the interview with Katie Couric again and you’ll see what I mean. She didn’t make a whole hill of beans of sense in that one.

“Life is like a box of chocolates ... you never know what you’re gonna get.”

Sweet on the outside, full of fluff on the inside.

Can I take her seriously when she pens a book entitled “Going Rogue”? I think they misspelled that on purpose.

The original title was meant to be “Going Rouge,” in light of her attractive features.

Could we take four years of her at the helm of this country?

I don’t think so.

We can hardly stomach the one we’ve got now, and he’s barely been in over a year.

G.W. didn’t garner nearly the ill will in all his years at the podium that B.O. has managed to suffocate us with in less than two.

Again, I ain’t hatin’...I’m just sayin’.

Did you read about the tempest in a teapot brewing over child porn purveyors getting smacked down with purchase fees? Every time they download or sell a photo of a victim, the victim gets paid for it. That is the latest legal wrangling going on in courts right now, and I think the victims absolutely should get paid for any photo that gets passed along. And the people who are passing them along or downloading them or buying them should have to pay the fine and immediately go before a firing squad.

I will pull the trigger each and every time, I have no problem saying.

Defense attorneys argue that their clients should not have to pay the victim a fee as their clients were not the ones who actually took the photos.

Again. It’s a Gumpster. Stupid is as stupid does.

Now, here’s another Gumpity ump ump.

Some British researchers are upset about third-hand smoke. If you thought you’d heard it all from the second-hand smoke camps, think again. Third hand smoke.

That’s the filmy stuff that lingers in your hair, on your clothes, on your furniture ... lays on the carpet like a little candy-coating.

They contend that it’s a hazard to children who lick or suck on furniture.

Seriously?

Both my parents were chain-smokin’ fools, and I can guarantee you that whenever I walked into the house, through that thick mystical haze-like atmosphere, the last thing I ever wanted to do was sit on the couch and lick a pillow.

I never wanted to lie on the carpet and lick my way toward the television or suck on the nap.

Now they are suggesting a ban on smoking in your homes and in your vehicles.

Oh trust me, that will be coming down the pike faster than the Marlboro Man riding on his death horse!

And I haven’t verified this one, but according to some folks who say they have (I may have to “Snopes” it), the Cap and Trade bill is gonna put a might big hammer down on you if you try to sell your house without it being retrofitted to be energy efficient.

You simply won’t be able to.

You will have to jump through hoops of fire in about five years to sell your house.

The EPA will have inspectors come to your house when you want to sell, and will make you pay for all the necessary upgrades to be “efficient” according to their standards. And they can change the standards every year if they want to.

You will have to have a clearly visible decal on your house that displays your rating.

Mind you, if your house is a hunk o’ junk, they haven’t said what they’ll do about that.

You won’t just be able to put up a for sale sign in  your yard anymore.

Not without it costing you a chunk o’ change first.

And last but not least, there is the soon-to-be formed Climate Service agency, combining parts of the National Weather Service and the NOAA (National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration), if the Commerce Department gets its way.

Apparently we are not happy with just checking the weather forecast anymore. Now the Global Warmers want a daily map of where the Ice Age is going to be pushing through next.

Here is my advice for dealing with the so-called “climate change:” Put your coat on or take your coat off.

Simple as that.

It’s a Gumpster.