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Taking a stab at joy
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Have you ever seen a preacher stab a bottle of dishwashing liquid during his sermon? A preacher in Tennessee did.
 
He was preaching a sermon on joy that he called, “Being ReJOYvenated.”
 
On the way to church, he decided to liven up the sermon with an object lesson. So he stopped by a store and bought two bottles of Joy dishwashing liquid. 
 
As he was preaching, he put a bottle of Joy in a big bowl and stabbed it repeatedly as he talked about how unforgiveness, bitterness and anger can rob our joy. Next, the preacher poured more liquid from the other bottle of Joy into the first bottle, refilling it. He talked about how when we face trials, God refills us with His joy and we can ooze our joy on others.
 
After the sermon, the minister went to the church kitchen to clean the bowl and prepare to preach the sermon again in the second morning service.
However, he looked down and noticed that he had splashed dishwashing liquid all over the front of his pants. Afraid it would look like something else was on his pants, he did the logical thing any man would do. He got a wet paper towel and wiped it. Bad move! 
 
Now he had more bubbles and wetter pants. So he rushed to the men’s room, where there was a one of those dryers on the wall to dry your hands.
The preacher pushed the button and pointed the dryer at his pants, while leaning back so that the warm air would hit the front of his pants. As he was doing this, a visitor walked into the men’s room. The preacher said, “Hi, I’m getting ready for the sermon today.” The visitor must have wondered what kind of sermon he was about to hear, or if he even wanted to hear it.
 
Suddenly the preacher thought about what he was preaching. His text was James 1:2: “Consider it great joy, my brothers, whenever you experience various trials.” It dawned on him that if the early Christians could face serious trials with joy, then God could help him to preach about it, even with wet pants.
 
 
(Copyright 2010 by Bob Rogers. E-mail: brogers@fbcrincon.com. Read this column each Friday for humorous stories of church life. For more “Holy Humor,” go to the Web page of First Baptist Church of Rincon at www.fbcrincon.com)

Is there a church for a big woman with an itch?
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A pastor was called to be guest preacher at a church. He knew this church was different when the congregation ended every line of the hymn with the shout of “yeehah!”


As he stood to preach, he noticed that people were spread out on the pews. He would see a person, then a space, then another person, and another space. He wondered why nobody sat next to another person, when he noticed on the pew beside each person was a cowboy hat.


Another time this same preacher was invited to a new church in the city. He was surprised to see that everybody there looked like they had fallen face first into a tackle box, because they had piercings and earrings on every part of the body imaginable. A rock band was playing alternative music on the stage.


As different as these two churches were, they were both growing and reaching people for Christ.


Years ago I was pastor of a small country church in the backwoods of Mississippi. There was another Baptist church just five miles away in the town (population 600). The pastor’s wife at the town church asked me, “Why don’t our two churches merge?” I said, “There are people in my church who would not feel comfortable or fit in at your town church.” She said, “Oh, come on. We’re a small town church. What could be so different?”


I said, “Well, I got one really big woman in my church who, when she gets to feeling an itch, she pulls her dress halfway up and she scratches herself.”


The eyes of this pastor’s wife got really big and she said, “I see what you mean.”


I forgot to tell her about another woman in my church who saw a roach running across the wood floor, so she stomped on it with her bare foot, laughed and shouted, “Aha! I got him!”


Yep, the culture was definitely different where I was pastor.


Jesus upset the religious establishment because He crossed cultural barriers. He loved to eat with tax collectors and Gentiles and other strange people. Jesus walked into the land of Samaria, full of half-breed Jews who worshiped in weird ways and talked different and smelled different.


Jesus walked right up to a Samaritan woman at a well and started talking her language. He accepted her culture, but he let her know her sinful lifestyle had to change. Soon she had the whole town following Jesus (see John 4).


So what cultural barrier is keeping somebody in your community from hearing the gospel? If you tear down the cultural barriers to share Christ in your neighborhood, you may hear the angels shouting, “Yeehah!”


Copyright 2014 by Bob Rogers. Email: brogers@fbcrincon.com. Read this column each Friday in the Herald. Visit my blog at www.bobrogers.me.