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Boston man seeks to promote chivalry as way to encourage self-worth
ames Michael Sama writes: "While men should perform chivalrous acts, women also should see it for what it is respect towards them." - photo by

A Boston-based consultant and writer has launched the "New Chivalry Movement" as a way to develop self-worth and respect in relationships.

"We shouldn’t let chivalry die because it is a value that encourages men to continue being respectful towards everyone. While men should perform chivalrous acts, women also should see it for what it is — respect towards them," wrote James Michael Sama on his website.

That didn't quite happen for Russia's President Vladimir Putin, whose recent act of chivalry this week — draping a shawl around Peng Liyuan, the wife of Chinese President Xi Jinping, on a chilly evening backfired among Chinese officials, the Associated Press reported. The public seems to have various ideas of chivalry partnered with cultural expectations.

Sama told Fox News that the "New Chivalry Movement" is a set of ideas that he hopes will help people define the meaning of love. He wants couples to know that respect is critical to any healthy dating relationship and if your relationship does not have that people need to have the courage to walk away until they find that mutual respect.

Sama started his website a year ago to write about dating advice and ideas for couples. He said that he is not an expert, but he does have life experiences. Sama increased in popularity after his blog "10 Ways to Know You Are Dating A Real Man" became an Internet sensation, and now he has had over 24 million visitors on his website, Fox News reported.

Sama wrote on his website that he believes that the public thinks chivalry should be dead because it is "demeaning" to women and their ability to complete tasks on their own.

He acknowledges that women can open their own doors and pull out their own chairs, but chivalry is not about the fact that a women can do something herself. It is sign of respect and courtesy.

"It’s an entire demeanor and way of living that extends beyond opening a door for a woman," he said. "It extends to how you treat everyone in your life, including other men."

Sabrina L. Schaeffer, executive director of Independent Women's Forum, shared her view on chivalry.

"If you want sameness, don’t expect chivalry," Schaeffer wrote.

She said the world of gender equality often encourages men and women to act the same, which may be harmful to women and girls. This culture can destroy healthy gender differences for relationships.

Schaeffer explained traditional customs of chivalry, like opening a door or giving up a seat for a woman, were not all motivated by sexist intentions, but were social rules that encouraged a man to be respectful to a lady.

"It (chivalry) might not have been perfect, but it had a purpose. Today’s dismissal of gender differences instead creates confusion, disappointment, and often more opportunity for harassment," Schaeffer wrote.