Last week I wrote a tongue-in-cheek column about "Top Biblical Ways to Find a Wife." In the interest of balance, this week I present Top Biblical Ways to Find a Husband:
1. If he doesn’t have a pick-up truck to wash, then give water to all of his camels (Rebekah and Isaac, Genesis 24).
2. A golden oldie: invite him to dinner (Zipporah and Moses, Exodus 2:20-21).
3. Work around him to get noticed, and then snuggle up to him when you get a chance (Ruth and Boaz, Ruth 2-3).
4. Tell your daddy you love him and let Dad do the rest (Michal and David, 1 Samuel 18:20, 27).
5. Win a beauty contest (Esther and King Xerxes, Esther 2).
Now, on the remote possibility that somebody misses the humor, here it is: the Bible is not necessarily recommending these methods for finding a husband, it’s just reporting what real life people did. And many of the things people did were funny. Admittedly, some things that people did in the Bible were neither recommended nor funny. David and Bathsheba would be a prime example (2 Samuel 11).
I suppose all of this begs a question: what does the Bible really recommend about finding a husband or wife? For starters, one should not rush to get married. Solomon’s Song of Songs reminds singles: "do not stir up or awaken love until the appropriate time" (Song of Songs 2:7, 3:5, 8:4). "Trying out" marriage by living together is not the answer, for it shows disrespect for the marriage commitment (Hebrews 13:4). So what should a person do? Here is the greatest guideline in the Bible: look for a spouse in the church. Christians should marry other Christians who share their philosophy of life (1 Corinthians 7:39; 2 Corinthians 6:14).
So Christian, do you want to find a wife or a husband? Then go to church and get to know somebody who loves Christ like you do, and trust God to take care of the rest in His timing. That will put a smile on God’s face and yours as well.
(Copyright 2011 by Bob Rogers. Email: firstname.lastname@example.org. Read my blog at www.holyhumor.blogspot.com.)