1.  You count so many sheep you start dripping with lanolin (yellow wax that comes from sheep...obviously!).                              2.  You barbeque steak for breakfast, because to you it seems like dinner.                                                                              3.  Rip Van Winkle becomes your new hero.                                                                                                                          4.  You drink so much warm milk you start burping cheese curds.                                                                                            5.  Watching the sunrise is about as inspiring as a wet dishrag.                                                                                                  6.  You subscribe to the Test Pattern channel on cable.                                                                                                          7.  You look at your Kindle for hours...without turning it on.
 8.  In your case, pillow talk consists of a bunch of swear words.                                                                                                9.  Your eyes are so bloodshot that motorists mistake you for a stop sign when you’re standing on the corner.                           10.  You have plenty of time to make idiotic lists like this.

Tim is a passionate writer, food lover and grandparent, and loves to write poems, lymrics, short stories and reviews of the things he notices around him. He covers national news items on his blog at rootsweb.com.