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Standing by the wrong graveside
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Once I had a deacon whose brother-in-law died. We’ll call him “Billy Ray” (not his real name). As far as the deacon knew, his brother-in-law did not have a pastor, so they asked me to conduct the service. But at the cemetery a preacher showed up that nobody knew anything about. Let me explain.

After the funeral that morning, everybody went home to eat lunch. Then we planned to meet at the cemetery 60 miles to the north, for an afternoon graveside service.

I rode with the funeral director to the cemetery. As we arrived, we noticed a little old man in a suit, standing by the freshly dug grave. I went over to meet him while the funeral director set flowers around the grave. The man in the suit explained that he was a retired pastor, and said, “The family asked me to help with the burial.” Although I was unaware that he was to help, I told him it was fine, and I asked if he would like to read scripture or give the final prayer. He opted to let me read scripture first, and he would conclude the service.

Soon the family drove up and filed into their seats under the funeral tent. I introduced the retired pastor with the explanation, “The family asked him to help, and after I read scripture, he will lead us in prayer.” Family members smiled, and so I began.

I read about the resurrection from 1 Corinthians 15, and the comforting words of Psalm 23. Then I stepped back and let the older minister speak. He immediately began to talk about what fine man “Johnny” was! I cringed when he mentioned the wrong name, and then he said it again; he talked about “Johnny” instead of “Billy Ray” two more times, before closing in prayer.

After the prayer, we both greeted the family members in their seats, shaking hands and hugging each one. Nobody had the heart to tell the other minister that he was at the wrong grave. I didn’t tell him. The family didn’t tell him. What good would it do then? After a few more minutes, I got into the funeral director’s car and waved good-bye to the preacher, as the director blurted out, “Who was that man?”

As soon as I got back to town, I made a beeline to the home where family members had gathered, to apologize. I told them, “I am so sorry. We never mentioned Billy Ray by name. I assumed he was at the right place.” They all laughed and said, “Don’t worry about it, preacher. It cheered us up; we laughed about it all the way home.”

Scripture says that God “comforts us in all our troubles,” and he even uses us to “comfort those in any trouble” (2 Corinthians 1:4, NIV). God used that pastor to bring comfort to the family, even though he didn’t plan to be at the wrong place.

On the other hand, I’ve always wondered if “Johnny” has family members still standing around somewhere, waiting for their minister to show up.

(Copyright 2011 by Bob Rogers. E-mail: brogers@fbcrincon.com. Read my blog at www.holyhumor.blogspot.com.)

Is there a church for a big woman with an itch?
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A pastor was called to be guest preacher at a church. He knew this church was different when the congregation ended every line of the hymn with the shout of “yeehah!”


As he stood to preach, he noticed that people were spread out on the pews. He would see a person, then a space, then another person, and another space. He wondered why nobody sat next to another person, when he noticed on the pew beside each person was a cowboy hat.


Another time this same preacher was invited to a new church in the city. He was surprised to see that everybody there looked like they had fallen face first into a tackle box, because they had piercings and earrings on every part of the body imaginable. A rock band was playing alternative music on the stage.


As different as these two churches were, they were both growing and reaching people for Christ.


Years ago I was pastor of a small country church in the backwoods of Mississippi. There was another Baptist church just five miles away in the town (population 600). The pastor’s wife at the town church asked me, “Why don’t our two churches merge?” I said, “There are people in my church who would not feel comfortable or fit in at your town church.” She said, “Oh, come on. We’re a small town church. What could be so different?”


I said, “Well, I got one really big woman in my church who, when she gets to feeling an itch, she pulls her dress halfway up and she scratches herself.”


The eyes of this pastor’s wife got really big and she said, “I see what you mean.”


I forgot to tell her about another woman in my church who saw a roach running across the wood floor, so she stomped on it with her bare foot, laughed and shouted, “Aha! I got him!”


Yep, the culture was definitely different where I was pastor.


Jesus upset the religious establishment because He crossed cultural barriers. He loved to eat with tax collectors and Gentiles and other strange people. Jesus walked into the land of Samaria, full of half-breed Jews who worshiped in weird ways and talked different and smelled different.


Jesus walked right up to a Samaritan woman at a well and started talking her language. He accepted her culture, but he let her know her sinful lifestyle had to change. Soon she had the whole town following Jesus (see John 4).


So what cultural barrier is keeping somebody in your community from hearing the gospel? If you tear down the cultural barriers to share Christ in your neighborhood, you may hear the angels shouting, “Yeehah!”


Copyright 2014 by Bob Rogers. Email: brogers@fbcrincon.com. Read this column each Friday in the Herald. Visit my blog at www.bobrogers.me.